The Park is just outside…….you guessed it…Corpus Christi 
$25 for W& E…….that’s water and electric for you folks who have not been RVing for almost a month like Karen and I! We’ve been gone for almost two months but I managed to invent excuses for ” how bout we stick around for a couple more days? I’m mean ya know the weather is looking a bit squirrely out there” So most of our trip has been us “RVing” is someone’s guest room……..eating their food……using their shampoo…… “hey that shits expensive “…….drinking their hooch…” that shits really expensive ” and ya know …watching their Netflix.
But back to Corpus SP… its an ok campground, I say ok because the opossum bend camping loop that we are in …is tight…..like I heard a guy burp this morning…..and no one was outside……..I mean it was a burp to be proud of…..but come on! That’s a little too close for me.
The lake is beautiful with good access and two piers …….the catching……is nada….not…..no fish here! Although the local I talked to , a guy named LeRoy …said that there are plenty of fish and ya never know what is gonna be on your line, catfish , white bass, Alligator Garr, large mouth bass, crappie ….ya never know said LeRoy!
Dude musta had his Nostradamus mojo working……cause shit got weird later………but first I must cast and cast and cast and try a top water plug….or try a plastic worm or a jig…or a crank bait ….or a EVERYTHING IN MY TACKLE BOX!!!!! I had a deep diver plug on , that had some weight to it……..what this means is , I’m able to cast it a long distance……..which makes fisherman happy…..because they are able to cover a lot of water!!!…..the truth is we are able to “not catch fish” over the long distance of a BIG CAST….…..which delays the realization that we are shitty fishermen AND we didn’t catch a fish on that cast either…just like the 8,437,307 casts prior to that one….what bunch of crap!! Fortunately for me, the “white breasted black winged stump chicken” were present in large numbers for my entertainment…..the stinky buggers!!
One bird in particular gave new meaning to “bird brain” …….continually trying to intercept my airborne plug…….ahhh….plugs have Very Sharp treble hooks…for those of you who have not imbedded a treble hook in your thumb SO FAR that the barb came out your elbow….suffice to say these things catch EVERYTHING! Your pants,your thumb,
THIS IS NOT MY THUMB……STOCK PHOTO****
you best pals sons ear ( sorry Colton), the dock, the railing…you get the picture.
Bird Brain…….upped his game to include diving into the water after the plug.
*
…..this bird made have been kin to the guy who drove thru the road closed gate a few weeks ago………..I made sure I began my retrieve the second the plug hit the water…it was a diving plug so it went out of bird brains depth pretty quick……and then on the tenth cast…….I muffed the bail set and fumbled the handle…..and time froze as the bird dove at the plug and the coil of line floating on the waters surface………..as I fumbled for the handle and tried to yank the plug away……you guessed it……..perfect hook set…..#$*$#+_[{¥|^!!!!!!!! This bird was hooked right in the beak!!!!!!!!!!
As my brain processed the best course of action, weighing the options of how to resolved the situation, calmly analyzing each of the many scenarios in milliseconds one after the other…with lightning speed
that’s bullshit…….my brain was screaming WTF! WTF! WTF! WTF!!!,…….fortunately as I freaked out ,LeRoy the friendly local Texas fisherman talked me off the ledge……”it’s ok man just reel him in” and I’m thinking great….just reel him in ,like you catch a bird on a bass plug every day.?My eyes scanned the shore line for the news crew that would surely report my transgressions on tonight’s evening news
” Dipshit from Wyoming targets poor defenseless “Stump Chicken” with razor sharp treble hooks. It appears to this reporter that the perpetrator may be part of a larger CELL of Aves- traffickers “!! Channel 13’s crack legal team weighs in on the possibility of hate crime charges at 11!!!
Fortunately for me ,LeRoy calmly talked me into “landing” the gull on the pier, but not before bird brain made several runs….making the drag SING! But then he expertly corralled the terrified bird( aves) and removed the hook from his beak.
**
LeRoy was cool as the other side of the pillow as he released the bird………..not sure what I would’ve done without his help
I didn’t catch what I was targeting…..but I caught something………..and I hooked it in the mouth……a guy can’t ask for much more……..except that nobody notice the sea gull shit ALL OVER my hat and sleeve. @#!!.”(*&$ fricking Stump chickens!
I returned to the 5er ( that’s what we seasoned , one month veteran RVers call our rigs) unsure if I was proud or embarrassed……..I settled on embarrassment and replied to Karen’s question of “catch anything “? I stammered and stuttered like when my Mom asked ” what are you burning up there in your room? Incense?” Yeah Ma its incense. ”
Nope didn’t get a bite”….Beads of sweat appeared on my brow …this was like every lie you told as a youngster…….she knows I’m lying…she knows..she knows…..as Karen looked at me trying to decide how much beer I could have possibly carried to the pier I fumbled with the channel changer………nothing on the news!! Thank god!! Just then Larry and Shannon walked in “Catch anything”? …..What the heck was this ……Guantanamo Bay?? STOP WITH INTERROGATIONS ALREADY! I can’t take anymore!…….Get off me already! Fortunately for me it was happy hour 
And the subject changed quickly to topics who’s foundation were not rooted in lies…………
how about we just keep the Stump Chicken Incident of 2019 on the down low for now?
* Special thanks to Shannon LeRoy for the wonderful painting of the stump chicken used in this story.
** Some names have been changed to protect the identity of those smart enough to understand the risk of being associated with my hijinks
*** no actual thumbs were used in the making of this story
Round the bend 
LOL
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